Thursday, August 5, 2010

Better Than Before

Before I became a target I was kind of floundering around in my life with not much direction and this is probably one reason for my targeting in the first place.   I never wanted to be the poster boy for Organized Group Stalking but this is what life presented me.  It gave me lemons and I making lemonade with them today as the saying goes. Obviously,  I would not have chosen this path myself at the beginning as no sane person would but adversity only strengthens you and I am in a better place for it today.  After I worked my way through the worst phases of my stalking like being in a fog and not knowing about this crime for 2.5 years while I had to experience it daily and being an active participant in it, ( my mind could not let go of it and not by my conscious choice) I started to gain control of my life again.   Learning about it changed a great deal of things for me and I started to improve upon my techniques of desensitization to it that I had started even before I finally learned about the existence of the crime.  The more you study it and learn about the techniques behind it and the how and why they do the things they do against you then it demystifies it and makes it much less threatening.   I am complacent person by nature (again a good target trait) but once I get going I will not stop.  I am an all or nothing type of person and I am now fulfilling my all portion of it by working behind the scenes against my stalkers daily.  My stalking has given me a great deal of purpose in my life now by motivating me to combat my stalkers and raise awareness about the crime.  I have learned to focus, discipline and control my mind much better than before because I never had the motivation to do it before.  Besides my activism, this focus has led me to become successful in other parts of my life as well that had been stagnating for a long time.   I have joked with my girlfriend that the worst thing my stalkers could do to me at this point is leave me alone because I would lose all my purpose and motivation again.  Actually, its too late for my stalkers because I will continue my activism regardless of what they do.  Nowadays, when the stalking activity is way down or goes away for a day  or two in my neighborhood I find that I don't even care about it and it has no bearing on my happiness one way or another.  When you get to this point you will know you have defeated your stalkers on a psychological level.  Everyone who is being victimized by these psychological attacks should be aiming to attain this point in their lives.
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